The mind is a powerful tool.
Once you get an idea of something and attach a certain feeling or emotion to it, it sticks.
That is the origin of great innovations, but also stereotypes and phobias.
As a kid, my mom helped me kill bugs. I just couldn’t get over the way it made me feel to just happen upon a creepy-crawly bug in my room or around the house.
Arggghhh! I can remember how scared I would get.
That’s all in the past now. Today, I’ve created this piece because I hope you can get rid of your phobias and stereotypes too!
How would you define a phobia?
When I say the word phobia, you probably already have a few ideas about what it means. The word phobia comes from the Greek word phobos, which means fear or horror. However, suppose you hear someone referring to a phobia that they (or someone they know) has. In that case, they’re referring to irrational fear.
Yes, the operative word for phobia is irrational. It’s like, you see a bug and jump to the ceiling, and the bug is only trudging along on its way. Why did you feel that way about a bug that may be going about its normal day?
See? Irrational feeling or thought.
How about a stereotype?
A stereotype is a fixed idea that is often untrue.
A stereotype is usually culturally promoted, and people within that culture tend to be educated with that stereotype in place. So, a child born today can unconsciously pick up fixed ideas about other things or people from their parents, grandparents, siblings, friends, and the environment.
What kinds of phobias are there?
I can tell you right off the bat that there are several named phobias. We’re not even talking about the ones that haven’t been named yet.
This article by Healthline.com names over 60 phobias, and I’m still recovering from reading all the kinds of phobias that exist. There are common phobias, though. You’ve probably heard about the phobias like fear of heights, insects and bugs, fear of water, thunder and lightning, fear of small spaces, fear of crowds, etc.
Stereotypes & Phobias
Getting to this part of the article, you’ve probably already noticed that these two terms are somewhat related. Intense fear of anything becomes a fixed idea because most times, you cannot let it go.
What got me thinking about this connection between stereotypes and phobias was one of my followers asking why she’s violently homophobic but bisexual.
We all have an idea of what something is like, and we often either like it or hate it. But, seriously, those things that we see or experience are neutral. Our minds just color it as positive or negative.
Understanding this can help you apply the tips in this next section.
Tips to get rid of Phobias & Stereotypes
Now, stereotypes, unlike phobias, can be a bit tricky. You don’t even know when or where you may have picked up some of the stereotypes you can think of. However, this shortlist can get you started on getting rid of phobias and stereotypes.
- Identify the stereotype and phobia:
Remember my violently homophobic Tiktok friend? It was a big step for her to identify precisely how she felt. It exposed her stereotype (i.e., thinking of gay people a certain way and not liking gay people as a result). With her stereotype identified, it was easy to say that she’s experiencing internalized homophobia. In her case, the stereotype she believed led to intense fear and mistrust for gay people.
You may want to watch out for those stereotypes that are probably creating phobias too. You can start by making a list of all the stereotypes and phobias you’ve ever experienced.
- Understand that stereotype or phobia:
You’ve identified that intense fear, and that’s a significant first step. Next, you want to understand more details, e.g., your triggers for the phobia. Also, in the case of stereotypes, you’d want to think about a past event where you may have unconsciously picked it up. The stereotypes are often rooted in the past. Especially when you were living unconsciously, but that can change now that you’ve identified them.
- Take action…gradually:
In my case, I got rid of my phobia for bugs by caring for others with the same phobia. If it sounds crazy, it isn’t. You’re simply taking action now that you’ve identified that phobia or stereotype. So, you face your intense fear, and you overcome it because you’re trying to protect someone you care about who cannot face their fear yet.
Of course, you should go at it gradually. Some phobias are so intense (e.g., fear of heights or confined spaces like elevators or closets), they cause severe panic and anxiety attacks. But, if you’re like me, and you think you can take what comes with facing the fear, you can jump right in. I mean, I couldn’t run out of my kindergarten class every time a bug appeared; what would my students think?
Getting rid of your stereotypes will be more gradual. When you make that list, you can begin each new day with reminders and affirmations that are opposite those stereotypes. It’s called cognitive restructuring, and a lot of therapists apply it.
Are you ready to rid yourself of stereotypes and phobias? I hope this article helps!